Down By The Bay: Fatkini Edition

What I Wore:
Cardi: Suzy Shier
Fatkini Top: Asos Curve
Shorts: Made by me
Fatkini Bottoms: ModCloth
Sunnies: Universal Studios

Last summer, a year into my fat acceptance journey, an amazing thing started to happen on the internet. I began to see all of these fabulous fat babes in fatkinis on blogs and on my dash on tumblr. In my own fat acceptance journey I was still an infant, but I admired these babes for their courage and I thought to myself "next year, next year I hope to be at that stage and able to don a kickass fatkini on the beach." The days passed and in the spring I began to scour the internet for the perfect fatkini to wear when we went up to the cottage. After a few months of hunting I finally found these high waisted bottoms on ModCloth. They were perfect, pretty much the bottom half of the bathing suit I had last summer, but I loved the look and I knew the brand fit well so I decided to go for it. ModlCloth also happened to have a killer sale on so I snatched these babies up and began to hunt for the top half to complete the look. It took me a little bit longer to find the perfect top, but Asos also had a sweet sale and I managed to pick the top up for under $20.00. The colour matched perfectly, and I loved the retro style. The only negative thing I can say is I am not sure who's ribs they measured when making the top but it is a little snug in that area. I intended to give it a bit of ease by adding a panel or something but I didn't have time to before we left. It was still comfortable enough to wear so I put on my new duds and went to the beach.

You might be ale to tell from the pictures but it was a little chilly and windy that day so I was wearing a sweater and shorts for a little while, but gosh darn I was going to wear that bikini at least once while we were away. Once it warmed up enough to take off my sweater I felt really comfortable wearing my fatkini for most of the afternoon. No one stared, no one laughed, no one made rude comments, and I finally felt like I belonged with all the other fat babes on the internet. It gave me so much confidence to be able to wear something like this, I wore it like a badge of honour. This is the first time I have ever worn a bikini in my entire life, and it felt so damn good. There is still some summer left in my corner of the world and I encourage all the fat babes I know and the ones I don't know to slip into your very own fatkini and go to the beach/a water park/ a pool whatever. Trust me it's not so scary, you will feel great, and you will definitely wonder why you never did it before. It's your turn to become part of the body confidence revolution.    

How To Be A Fat Bitch e-course #11: Dealing With Diet Talk

source

Assignment

It might also help you if you write down some responses in your own words to these inevitable encounters so that you feel prepared to get through your next family reunion or workplace potluck. Even if you don't use them you can work through your feelings about it. Blog it, Instagram it, Tweet it (#fatbitchecourse, #nearsightedowl), etc. and share it in the comments below.

This is definitely a hot button issue for my family. It comes up pretty frequently at family gatherings so it will be great to have a few go-to responses for when this happens. It will also be nice for work because I have a few co-workers that are not body positive and it is hard to deal with sometimes. Here are some of the responses that I came up with:

"I think people have a right to do what they want with their body. Who are we to judge? How do we know that they aren't perfectly happy as they are?"
"To me fat is not a negative word, it is simply a descriptive word, like happy or tall etc."
"You cannot make assumptions about a person's health based off of their size. There are a way more contributing factors to health besides weight anyway."
"I don't feel comfortable discussing other people's/strangers choices, especially in regards to their body, it's too personal. Let's talk about something else. Have you read any good books lately?"

I think that's a pretty good standard list for most of the situations I have found myself in. Can anyone think of anything else to add?

Discussion

I recently made the decision to either unfriend or filter out online friends that do a lot of diet talking or post fat hate. It wasn't exactly easy and a one didn't understand and lashed out at me. What is your policy on online friends? Have you gone through your friend's list and given people the axe?

When I finished school I went through my Facebook and "axed" quite a few of the people that I had friended over the years. Most of the people didn't get axed because of diet talk (although there were a few). It was mostly people that I only friended because they were in my programs and it was good to have them on there for contact purposes. I make it a personal rule to not friend anyone unless I really know them and their ideals. It's the same for blogs, tumblr, pinterest etc.. I read through their posts and make a decision based off of what I see. If they seem negative in anyway about body positivity or other important issues, then I won't follow them. I definitely filter who I am friends with online, it just makes life more pleasant for everyone involved.

How To Be A Fat Bitch e-course #9: Haters Gonna Hate

*I skipped Weeks 7 and 8 for now but I am working on them slowly*

Assignment

Surround yourself with fat positive people and things! I make a point of doing this and it can be difficult to let go of a friend or TV show but if they make hateful comments about you or someone else and are not supportive, it's time to say goodbye. Make a list of 5 friends, activities, TV shows, books, websites, etc. that are fat positive. Blog it, Instagram it, Tweet it (#fatbitchecourse, #nearsightedowl), etc. and share it in the comments below.

Discussion

For the most part, I ignore the haters. I usually avoid comments on articles, forums, etc. But occasionally when I am in the right mindset, I read a few comments and they end up motivating me. Probably the opposite of their intent. How do you handle the haters? I would recommend not reading their comments. They are gross.

Generally I try to avoid reading comments because they are just going to make me angry. When I do read them, at first I get mad, but then I realize that the person making that comment is probably insecure about their own appearance and feels the need to take it out on others. I tend not to leave my own comment unless it is something that I feel very passionate about and can make a meaningful contribution to. 

Mint & Coral Attraction

What I Wore:

Dress: Wal Mart (blagh)

Belt: Bealls

Shoes: Ardene

Sunnies: Universal Studios Orlando

Necklace: Hopewell Rocks, NB

That's funny, I didn't realize I was wearing two items from tourist attractions until I typed this up. I got the sunglasses on our trip to Florida in February, and my necklace two years ago (holy crap has it been that long!) when we went out East for my graduation from Dalhousie University. My belt was also purchased during our Florida trip, man I got way too many things from that store. I wish there was a Bealls in Canada, they had some really great stuff at great prices. Geez, I sound like and advertisement.  

Last year I probably would not have been caught dead wearing a dress this short. I mean it's not really that much shorter than some of the shorts I have, but it just seems sooooo revealing. You can see my legs in all their cellulite covered glory. But you know what, I don't really care. My legs are glorious and that's that. The only other problem with this dress is that it's from Wal Mart. I don't really like shopping there, but it was very cute and $9 so I couldn't resist.

Got a great day planned today. I am going shopping with a friend  on Ottawa St. and we are hopping to find a certain pattern to make some sailor shorts. Then we are going to check out the new Target. I hope it is a sweet here as the few I have been to in the states. Happy Friday!!!

One Year Blogoversary Top 10

This is actually a picture from my birthday, I did not make a cake to celebrate my blog birthday!

In honour of my one year blogoversary this week I thought it would be fun to do a top ten of my favourite outfits over the last year. I cannot believe it has been a whole year already, and what a year it's been. My style has definitely changed (for the better I think), I am actually wearing the clothes that I want to wear now. I am kind of embarrassed to look at some of those earlier posts to be honest, what was I thinking?! I think my photography has improved a bit too, the natural lighting and outdoor shots make a huge difference. I am glad that I have stuck to my New Year's goal of taking more outdoor photos, it really is a lot of fun. Adding more of my sewing projects on here has also been great, I like sharing what I am working on with other people.

When I started this little blog  I had no intentions for it to turn into a body positive fat acceptance blog but I am so glad that it has. I have "met " a lot of really cool people through that movement and it has helped me become a better person. There have been some hard time too of course, no year is safe from at least a little heart ache, but this blog has helped me get through the rough times. Thank you to all of my readers new and old who have stuck it out with me, here's to another year at least!

Without further ado here are my top 10 outfits from the last year:

10.

July 6th 2012 Too Hot To Trot (Seriously) 

9. 

                                  

 Nov. 19th 2012 Buttoned Up

 8.

Nov. 23rd 2013 Giddy Up! Cowpunk Style 

7.

Dec. 22nd 2012 Holiday Firsts 

6. 

April 1st 2013 Weekend Walk

5. 

 December 3rd 2012 Mauve Trees

4. 

                                   

May 10th 2013 White Tights polka Dots

3. 

May 8th 2013 (Almost) Entirely Thrifted

 2.

February 20th 2013 Mini Skirts and How To Be A Fat Bitch e-course Week #3

1.

February 6th 2013 Capoting Around

It was hard to pick only 10, I had to veto a couple, but I am pretty happy with my choices. These aren't the most commented on outfits or anything, just the ones I liked the best. I picked Capoting Around as first because that the was the most fun to photograph. It was one of my first outdoor shoots and it was really enjoyable. There is a decent mix of old and new here, and you can see the style progression I think. I hope you enjoyed this as much as I have and  I hope you stick around for more fun in the future!

Colin wanted to contribut too so he said I shoul dmake you watch this happy birthday video. It's pretty funny.

25 Things Fat People Shouldn't Do #19 and #23

25 Things Fat People Shouldn't Do is an unabashed middle finger to the preposterous idea that any human who weighs more than the status quo does not deserve to live a full and well rounded (ahem) life. The list of 25 is composed word for word from direct lists of sheer assholery found on the internet. These range from the absurd to the profoundly shameful, and I will be disproving this offensive notion with style. Feel free to join in on the fun, and if you do, link at the bottom so I can share. May the Chub Club live long and prosper!

It has been far too long since I have posted about anything on this list. I have had these pictures on my computer since our trip to Florida in February, and just haven't gotten around to posting them here. Why not knock of two of the items on the list at once?

#19 Fly in an airplane. Here is a picture of me and my sister in our seats on the plane. Can you imagine how shocked the other passengers must have been to see a fat person sitting (next to a skinny person no less) in a seat on a plane? How did I fit in there? How come I didn't crush the other person? And the plane didn't crash because of me, imagine that.  

#23 Sit in  booth. Here is a picture of me sitting in a booth in a restaurant and *gasp* drinking a milkshake. Two no-no's at once, the world should have come to a screeching halt  Guess what though? It didn't, what a surprise.   

Hearts and Bows

What I Wore:

Dress: Bealls 

Shirt: Giant Tiger

Belt: Spoof (a store in Toronto)

Leggings: Suzy Shier

Boots: ModCloth

So I was feeling pretty awesome in this outfit when I was wearing it earlier this week. I love how you can kind of see the hearts through the thin black crepe. It's pretty sweet. I was going to try out something a little different with my shoes but a) it was really cold and b) it apparently  looked a bit odd/eccentric and since I was going to work I decided to play it safe. I really should have just worn what I wanted to, and I kind of regretted it afterwards, but there is always next time (and like I said it was coooold). I went about my business feeling amazing still. I kind of felt like what Rae is saying in this GIF from My Mad Fat Diary (I say I felt like what she is saying because you can tell she doesn't really believe it, but she is trying too and that's what matters).

And then someone had to go and make the comment "That outfit doesn't really do anything for me." Now, I know they didn't mean it in a harmful way, but this is someone I respect and it really hurt. A lot of horrible things went through my head. First I thought "Maybe I do look awful" and then I checked myself and realised that was ridiculous. Then I thought "Maybe I don't like how I look because you dress like a 13 year old boy" but that was kind of mean (but true and they have admitted this). In the end I realized the person said it because they don't feel comfortable with themselves and they feel the need to comment on others who do feel confident. They are not necessarily conscious of this, but they still do it and it can be hurtful. But now that I realize the comments are coming from a very insecure part of that person and that I shouldn't take it personally. They just need to be taught how to love themselves so they can look awesome everyday just like I do! Maybe I should make them read some of the fat acceptance blogs that helped me on my own journey, share the love so to speak. I will leave you with this quotation from Jes over at the Militant Baker. (Some context, this is from her post Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls..SO I Will)

"Wearing whatever you want is a political statement. Join the revolution. Throw style rules out the window. Wear the tutu. Wear the horizontal stripes. Wear the turquoise skinny jeans. Wear the see-through blouse. Wear the bikini. Wear the sweat pants. Wear the shirt that says "Does this shirt make me look fat?". Wear whatever it is that makes you happy. This is your life."

How To Be A Fat Bitch e-course Week #6

Discussion

If you had to name your VBO, what would you call it? I think I would name mine Ms. Jiggly N. Fluffy, Master of Sexy and Spandex. Because she likes spandex. Your turn!

Squishy "Not A Baby But Still Awesome" McGee 

Assignment

Stand in front of a mirror and come to terms and get to know your VBO. Talk to it, tell it why you love it, sing it a song, tell it it's sexy, touch it, etc. Do this once or until you have happy feelings about your belly. Blog it, Instagram it, Tweet it (#fatbitchecourse, #nearsightedowl), etc. and share it in the comments below.

A Letter To My VBO

Oh VBO, 

in the past I haven't been very kind to you and I think I need to apologize to you for that.

I used to stare at you in the mirror, think mean thoughts about you and call you names.

I didn't think you were very attractive and wished you away on several occasions.

I would hate it when people would mistake you for being a baby and not just fat.

To be perfectly honest you used to be the stuff of nightmares. 

But lately things have changed. Lately I don't hate you so much. 

Lately I have grown to accept you, appreciate you, even love you. 

And do you know why?

Because you are a part of me.

You are what makes me special.

You are what makes me beautiful.

You are what makes me me. 

And I love you for that. 

So thank you VBO for helping me learn to accept and love you, 

and in turn accept and love myself.

I hope we can put our hateful relationship behind us and have a long and happy life together.

Yours always,

Hope  

 

I'll Fly Away

What I Wore:

Shirt: H&M

Neckalce: Target

Cardi: Smart Set

Jeans: Zellers

Patches: c/o Vintage-Patch

Shoes: Ardene

I mentioned a while ago that I won the giveaway that was hosted by Vintage-Patch. I had been eyeing some of their products for a while and it came as a surprise when I actually won. I was sooooo excited when my patches arrived in the mail last week! I already had plans on what to do with them and I immediately went to work applying them (I will share that post later today). I love these jeans, and I have worn them a few times on here, but they were actually starting to wear out in the knees (which is weird because that's not where my pants usually begin to wear) so they were the perfect place to put my newly acquired patches. I wore these pants to work today and I got a lot of compliments on the patches. I am really happy with how they look, I am so happy that I won the giveaway, and I am very happy with my experience with Vintage-Patch. I will definitely be ordering from them at some point in the future.   

---

This is un-related to the patches on my pants, but it happened while I was wearing these clothes and thought I would share. As I mentioned yesterday as part of my assignment for the Fat Bitch e-course this week I am going to do outfit pictures everyday. I think this assignment came at the perfect time because I received an unpleasant comment at work yesterday and I really needed an image boost afterwards, so taking vain pictures was perfect. Someone asked me if I was pregnant yesterday at work and it made me feel a little unhappy (at first). Now this has happened before a couple times in the past, and before it made me feel gross and uncomfortable. But not today. Today my response was "No, that's just my belly." and happily patted it. After they left I started to feel kind of angry, like they had intruded a bit into my life. The person was nice about it, but still is it a stranger's business to know if I am pregnant? No! Should they be asking those kinds of personal questions in a public setting? No! Should they be asking personal questions in general? No! I think the most annoying part is that every time this has happened the person has backed up my response by saying "Good, because I thought you looked too young anyway." Excuse Me?! You don't know how old I am. I could want to be pregnant at a young age (and I am 24, which considering isn't that young. I know a few people who are married and have kids already). And even if it was unplanned, you just don't say that. What if I wanted to get pregnant and couldn't, or I had a miscarriage and you just brought up painful memories? It's just inappropriate  It's my body and my business. And even after that I love my body. I love my round stomach, and a few un-wanted pregnancy comments can't make me hate it. I am fat and I am beautiful and those two things can be synonymous.

How To Be A Fat Bitch e-course Week #4

After a brief hiatus Rachele is back with her blogging and the Fat Bitch e-course. Here is the latest assignment for you all. Enjoy! 

Discussion

How has seeing fat bodies in the media affected you? Like Adele, Gabourey Sidibe, Aidy Bryant from SNL, Beth Ditto, Melissa McCarthy, etc. Do you gravitate towards fat positive music, TV and movies?
We aren't really exposed to beautiful fat bodies in our culture. When we see fat bodies on tv or in movies they usually aren't shown in a positive light. I think this needs to change. All body types need to be shown as being beautiful. Everyone is different and we shouldn't be glorifying just one type of body. But I digress, right now I am writing about fat bodies in particular. I am relatively new to loving fat bodies. Not that I would hate on other people before, but I didn't love my own body and I didn't actively seek out other fat bodies (even as an inspiration to loving my own).  I don't think I tended to gravitate to other fat bodies in the past because I was in denial about my own. I didn't accept and love my fat so I didn't really love other's fat either. I didn't start to love my fat body and other fat bodies until I started reading fat acceptance blogs about a year ago. As a result I don't really have a fat body role model. Probably my first exposures to fat bodies being portrayed as beautiful in the media were America Ferrara in UglyBetty (she's more average than fat but it was a start) and Nikki Blonsky in the remake of Hairspray. I am going to make a more conscious effort now to seek out more media of fat bodies. It is good to have that kind of diverse body imagery in your life. There isn't just one kind of body, one kind of beautiful, and I think I need to educate myself more about fat bodies.

After writing the above I went and watched all of My Mad Fat Diary and I fell in love with the show and with Rae. She is beautiful and that show is amazing and a great inspiration for fat bodies everywhere. I was really struggling with the assignment this week, it went through a few incarnations, but I ended up settling on making a collage of Rae (Sharon Rooney). I hope you like it!

Assignment

Create a tribute to a fat body. Your fat body or somebody else's. Make a papier mache figure, draw a silhouette photograph your rolls, curate a collection of images of bodies similar to yours, etc. Blog it, Instagram it, Tweet it (#fatbitchecourse, #nearsightedowl), etc. and share it in the comments below.

Sharon Rooney from My Mad Fat Diary

P.S. There weren't a lot of full body pictures of anyone from this show so I had to work with what was available.